Dar al-Islam

Muslim Family Day FTW!!

Okay so I check my e-mail today and read an e-mail that made me superhappy lol.

Iiiit's....MUSLIM FAMILY DAY at Six Flags Great America! Woot!

It sounds like a really awesome way to spend the time, however, I won't be able to make it. T_T Inshallah, everyone else there will have a good time, though =)

You know what I'd be the most excited about? Hearing the adhan throughout the park. I haven't heard it out loud since I visited Pakistan 11 years ago.

Ya Allah- Death To Spammers!

XD

Okay, okay, the dua may be a tad off (not really, though >.>). But I just took a lot of time out to fix the horrendous spam problem I had on this and all my other blogs. Inshallah, I've fixed it now.

The vast majority of the comments were successfully saved...if you don't see yours then it wasn't saved. T_T Sorry. =/

Hopefully I don't have to put up with the largely haram-related spamming anymore (gambling, viagra, interest-full mortgages, alcohol, etc, etc.)

Somehow, I Got Suprised Again

I honestly don't know why things like this still surprise me. I mean, really. You'd think it'd be old news by now, what with the whole Nancy Pelosi thing.

Honestly, I've lost so many brain cells reading that article that all I can say now is: are Americans really that threatened? I mean REALLY?!

-shakes head- Sadness.

An interesting fact to note is that in over 20 pages of comments, I read only one congratulatory one. All the others were quite creative in bashing that ridiculous Malkin girl (or whatever her name is, it doesn't matter since she's clearly not an intelligent human being).

In some completely unrelated news...I have yet to hear back from John (of first two post commenting fame). Hrmm...

Truly There Are Those Who Walk Blind

SubhanAllah, I just watched an interview of Ayaan Hirsi Ali (I'll not minx words here, she's going straight to hell, inshAllah and Ameen). Here it is for your bud-du'a (sp?) and lolling pleasure:

(The funniest part is how the interviewer- a white male- couldn't even believe the bullshit she was spewing. He ended up laughing out loud and calling her on her pigheaded support of American "democracy".)

But even beyond the funnies was the seriousness of her delusion. I could not- I COULD NOT- believe one of the things she said. Now, I realize it was all bull, but one snippet of dialog in particular stood out like a thorn:

Hirsi Ali: There's no Islamophobia- it's a myth.

[mostly indistinguishable one worders, here]

Interview: Is there anti-Semitism?

HA: [pause] It's different. Islam is not a race.

Interviewer: Is there- Is there racism?

HA: Uh, sometimes. We're all racists. Racism is a universal trait- so is anti-Semitism, by the way. But I want us, not to confuse a set of beliefs such as Islam with ethnicities such as hatred against Jews just because they are Jews, or against blacks just because they are black. Or against gays because it's just something you can't do anything about. Whereas Islam is simply a set of beliefs and it's not Islamophobic to say Islam is incompatible with liberal democracy... That's not Islamophobic- that's fair.

Don't worry, I'll give you all a chance to digest this crap and then throw it back up. ... Done? Okay, let's dissect this diatribe one line at a time, shall we, and see just how stupid this woman is- because believe me, only stupidity could cause such ignorant statements and nothing else.

"There is no Islamophobia- it's a myth."

My favorite part about this statement is how she doesn't also add that things like Islamofacism and Islamoterrorism are also myths. Isn't it funny how when we're playing the Islamogames, only certain Islamowords are dismissed as myths and others are kept as very "real" threats?

"It's different. Islam is not a race."

You know, that second sentence is the truest part of the whole interview. You know what renders the whole thing baloney? Yea, the first sentence. Let's look at why.

Hirsi Ali claims that anti-Semitism exists, but Islamophobia is a myth. Anti-Semitism is hatred of and/or against Jews. Who are Jews? People who follow the Jewish faith. So...that's makes Jews an ethnic group? A race unto themselves? Uhmm...no. No, it doesn't.

The ethnic race would be Semites, which the original inception of the word actually meant Arabs. However, to be anti-Semitic is to specifically hate Jewish people, not all Semites. So therefore, following basic logic, can anti-Semitism be shoved under the category of racism? No- no it can't. Keep reading, this issue is brought up again.

"We're all racists."

Okay, really? Do I really have to dissect everything that's wrong with this statement? I won't insult anyone's intelligence, let's just move on.

"Racism is a universal trait- so is anti-Semitism, by the way. "

Where does this woman get off speaking on behalf of the world? No, seriously? Who died and made her the boss? Anti-Semitism is not a universal trait. By first saying that we're all racists, Hirsi Ali first implies that racism is natural. By then going on to say anti-Semitism is in the same boat as racism, she quite boldly implies that anti-Semitism, too, is natural. EXCUSE ME?! If anyone needs me to clarify this further, by all means, comment and I will edit it but for now, I feel this indignation is sufficient.

"But I want us, not to confuse a set of beliefs such as Islam with ethnicities such as hatred against Jews just because they are Jews, or against blacks just because they are black."

Oh, how benign of you to worry about our confused little heads. I think plenty of readers will agree that it is she that is trying to cause confusion, especially after I am through, inshAllah.

She first starts by saying she doesn't want us to mix Islam (a set of beliefs, thereby, a religion) with ethnicities such as Jews. See, even the way she's worded it hints at her possible crack habits. Read it, grammatically, it's a nightmare. But okay, English is probably not her native language, I can live with that.

Hatred against Jews, because they're Jews, is apparently, as explained above- natural, and therefore, something that is just inherent in human beings (according to Hirsi Ali). So is hatred against blacks simply because they're black. So following Hirsi Ali's own logic...what would she call Hatred against Muslims simply because they're Muslims?

Oh- wait...doesn't that sound an awful lot like hatred against Jews because they practice Judaism? Because that's what it means to "be a Jew". Her argument here is not an argument, it is a fallacy. She began with a lie, trying to say the followers of the religion of Judaism somehow are different (perceptually) from the followers of the religion of Islam. You can't base an "argument" off a lie. The argument itself, even without the lie is defunct due to her firm belief that everyone is a racist at heart.

"Or against gays because it's just something you can't do anything about."

So now gay people, who are only different in their sexual orientation have also become a separate race and are likewise, inherently hated. How is a sexual orientation suddenly a race?! CAN SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN THIS WOMAN TO ME?! I find I can only function on logic, and therefore am getting a headache.

"Whereas Islam is simply a set of beliefs and it's not Islamophobic to say Islam is incompatible with liberal democracy..."

Maybe Hirsi Ali doesn't know that anti-Semitism is also known as judeophobia. Seriously, it is. So if Islam is "simply a set of beliefs" (thus constituting a religion), and Judaism is also a religion (thus in her words, "a simple set of beliefs"), then how is judeophobia and islamophobia any different? How is one just racism and the other a myth? Please explain this to me, Hirsi Ali, I'm dying to know how the wheels in your head turn because mine are normal. What're yours on?

Maybe a definition will help enlighten Hirsi Ali.

"...the British Runnymede Trust defined Islamophobia as the "dread or hatred of Islam and therefore, to the fear and dislike of all Muslims," stating that it also refers to the practice of discriminating against Muslims by excluding them from the economic, social, and public life of the nation. It includes the perception that Islam has no values in common with other cultures, is inferior to the West and is a violent political ideology rather than a religion." --Wikipedia

See that part where it says how Islamophobia is also "the practice of discriminating against Muslims by excluding them from the economic, social, and political life of the nation"? That's what you're doing when you say that Islam is "incompatible" with liberal ideals of democracy. Yea, and you're also doing that other thing where you're saying it's "inferior to the West". Plus, notice how you never actually mentioned Islam as a religion? Yea, that's where you're doing that last bit...

Uh-oh! Looks like someone's got a case of Islamophbia! Hey, Hirsi Ali, before you decided to open your fat mouth and criticize all things Islam- did you realize you were an Islamophobe? But enough about her, we've got one more line to cover.

"That's not Islamophobic- that's fair.

And hopefully, dear readers who are, InshAllah, infused with more knowledge from Allah than Hirsi Ali- InshAllah, you can see how that is very much not fair, and is in fact, very prevalent. By none other than the speaker, even!

It kinda sucks that you, Hirsi Ali, were never shown true Islam, but you know what? I don't feel one bit sorry for you, and you know why? Because while you were in your beloved Western world, it would have been much much easier for you to pick up a book on Islam and read it rather than write a slandering one which shows your own ignorance.

May Allah grant the believers patience in dealing with the lies that are being widespread about the True Deen and may he be swift in fulfilling his promises about those who spread fitna. Ameen. Please remember to make du'a for our brothers and sisters all over the world- it is the least we can do.

The Qur'an Explains Current Chaos

The unbelievers are protectors of one another. If you fail to do likewise, there will be disorder in the land and great corruption."
[Qur'an 8:73]

SubhanAllah, and we know this to be true because we wake up in the morning and read the news. Our Muslim brothers and sisters are dying by the hundreds all over the world. And what can the supposedly "muslim" countries do? Give smooches in greeting to none other than Condoleezza Rice.

For sure, Muslims are heading towards a downward spiral. What the Ummah needs right now is a Shari'a state. A proper Shari'a state, mind you, not the flimsy lipservice we can see currently.

The unbelievers are protectors of one another.
[from Qur'an 8:73

This is all too true. The atrocious violation of Human Rights committed in Israel are possible (and ONLY possible) because of US backed aide. If it were not for the US, any country would agree that these obscene habits of Israel need to be corrected. However, the US protects it's little toy in the Middle East and the toy continues its antics.

By the same logic, we can see the antics haven't ceased because despite "verbal disapproval", not a single Muslim country has stepped up to the plate. I won't even mention the torture camps of the US.

May Allah grant the Ummah good sense to follow the Qur'an and Sunnah, establish Shari'a, and may he grant all Muslims patience until such time as the above takes place.

Peace For The Soul

SubhanAllah, hearing the Qur'an recited is so calming to the soul. I'm not talking about it just sounding good, I'm talking about it touching something very deeply inside...

It has such a profoundly tranquil effect. Maybe the soul is rejoicing in time well spent.

And if it's a great recitor- so much the better. It's funny because this reminds me of something from my past, in which I feel the power of the Qur'an is apparent.

I was very little...maybe five or six. My sister and I slept on a sofa bed in the living room. It was late at night one time, and I was wakened for whatever reason. My ears picked up the sound of my dad reading Qur'an aloud in the dining room (which was adjacent to the living room).

He doesn't have the best tajweed or anything, he was just reading it...and I loved listening to it. So much so, that when he stopped I cried. I'm not a loud crier, and never have been, so it was just tears, not bawling. I don't believe my Dad ever knew I was awake.

It was a very private experience. I'm sure he used to read the Qur'an at the dining room table often, I just remember that day I'd woken up. But even as a child, who never read the translations with the Arabic (like I do now), it was such a moving experience.

Just the way the words are strung together...human beings intuitively feel inside- that therein lies a great thing.

Inshallah, I hope to keep my hearing till I die so that I might listen to the Qur'an up to the last minute, and may Allah let me keep my eyesight till that minute as well, so that I might be reading Qur'an up to that point. I hope this for myself, but as I am a Muslim, I can't keep this hope only for me- inshallah, my dua goes out to every Muslim brother and sister out there. Ameen.

Too Angry For Words

The title says it all. At this point I can feel the blood boiling in my veins and pounding in my ears. Why you might ask?

http://matchingislam.blogspot.com/ (I'm not linking to it anymore, because that'll just up his Google Page Rank >.<)

I've returned to this article to vent a little bit. Justice will be served, Inshallah, for Allah never fails in fulfilling his promises. I just really wonder what this animal's face will look like on his deathbed when he'll realize just what he was spewing.

Mostly, I just can't believe the audacity. You dare to tell me to leave my country? I'm a citizen. I'm more of a citizen than you, most likely. Just from experience, the Muslims I know (or even just foreign-born individuals, really) are far better citizens. They litter much less, if ever, are better at English (that does say something, usually are much more thankful for their intellectual freedom, try to better the country with their views of right and wrong, and excel academically (face it, if the country's giving great education and you're not using it, you're failing).

And what is it if not Islamophobia when he insists you love all other religions BUT Islam? You're going to try to tell me to respect Hinduism more? Where there's that caste system which humiliates and shuns the disabled and sick? Do you know what an Untouchable is?

Compare that with Islam where the sick, the disabled and the orphans are taken care of and it is explicitly stated in the Qur'an to help them. Where widows are looked after and respected, not encouraged to burn with their dead husbands so they're not a burden on society.

Every word in that animal's article speaks volumes of condescension and arrogance. His very stance is one of being better.

"The goal of eliminating Islam from the planet, and to mete out harsh punishment to those who would resist that, be they Muslim or otherwise. I hope such an elimination be done peacefully." (Emphasis, mine)

Oh, this is so laughable, the irony of the hypocrisy of it all. Peacefully? Peacefully?! You're going to mete out harsh punishments for the followers and supporters of the True Deen and you're going to do this peacefully?! Harsh...peaceful...hrmm...BULLSHIT.

As for the proposition of false converts...that is already happening. It is much to obvious. From all the puppet governments in various Islamic countries, from all the "radical" shit they love talking about, it's all planted. And unfortunate individuals are brainwashed with that garbage to further soil the image of Islam.

There is only one Islam, which can be found in the elegant verses of the Qur'an and the beautiful Sunnah of the Prophet (saw). There is this and nothing more.

One other chilling, repulsive and absolutely infuriating quote from that pig's article, just to show you where he's going with this:

"All but Muslim are welcome. All but Muslim are fully human."

Oh, I could die from the sick amusement of it all. You dole out your humanity to all who cares to receive it from you, we receive our humanity from Allah (swt) and you will die a slow and painful death before you can take that away from us.

Thanks are due to JDsg for the timely and appropriate Qur'anic verse:

"Remember how the Unbelievers plotted against thee, to keep thee in bonds, or slay thee, or get thee out (of thy home). They plot and plan, and Allah too plans; but the best of planners is Allah."
[Qur'an 8:30]
Ameen.

Some Days...

Sometimes, there are days where the only thought that gets me through is something along the lines of, "Ooh, just wait until Isa (as) returns to Earth, then we'll see who's wrong and who's right!"

>.<

There is so much propaganda against Islam and so many close minded people, it's everywhere I turn! YouTube, the news, people I meet, various websites, people having conversations with each other as they pass the MSA table, books, magazines, when will it end?!

Of course, the answer is when Isa (as) returns, but sometimes, I wish that were tomorrow.

Ugh, truly, the knowledge of Allah (swt)'s absolute justice does wonders for the soul. You can go ahead and spread all the lies you want today... Today is so temporary.

I can't thank Allah (swt) enough for having made me a Muslim (I'm so blessed!!!), and I hope to die as one, too, inshallah.

On a side note, I think it'd be super lucky if my last words were the shahadah- a reconfirmation of faith, I wish I could die with the name of Allah on my lips! <3

I Grow Weary

I was not going to post today, but after reading a certain article, I feel I must. I'm going to try to wrap this up quickly, because my mom is trying to sleep on the bed behind me and my computer is the Loud Comp of D00m.

My Brother's Three Months in Solitary

Please read it. It's written by the sister of one of the brothers who were imprisoned without charges in Canada (Heard of the Toronto 18?). I normally do not cry over articles, blog posts, and other short pieces of writing but there was no way I could not at this.

It is truly touching and anyone who claims to believe in democracy should be enraged to the core. I don't care what religion you are, YOU DO NOT TREAT PEOPLE THIS WAY.

I wish there was some way I could make the world see, I really do. Pointless as it is to lament about such things, I can't help but feel this way at times like these. I just want to go to the people that dismiss these incidents and scream at them, or, or, I don't know force them to watch the brutality because it's a lot tougher to ignore that way.

Of course, Allah (swt) guides who he wills and I am nobody to say anything. I just wish the hypocrites could try and actually address this- it'd be funny in a horribly humorless way to see them try and "justify" their actions. What exactly can they say? Nothing.

My duas go out to those honorable brothers who are putting up with so much from such ignorant people. And to the rest of the Ummah that's suffering in other parts of the world while I sit here and blog away about it. Inshallah they will be granted a place in Jannah for their suffering and patience and remembrance of Allah (swt) in their time of need. Ameen.

I grow weary of this world.

Oh, Brother

Some highly amusing and very interesting things go down at the MSA da'wah table at my institution of learning. No, really. Now, normally, I'd miss all the action because I had work and a very annoying class with a prof that needed to be punched in the face. *ahem*

However, since quitting my job and getting rid of that class, I have been able to see some interesting debates and even more interestingly close-minded people. Case in point: last Thursday (April 3).

So here I am, sitting at the table, minding my own business, hoping people will pick up the really cool fliers for Islam Awareness Week, etc, when a white, older lady stops by the brother's table.

Now, this was of slight concern to me because the brother sitting there isn't really into the MSA, as far as I know, but he said he had some time to kill and since our brothers never show up, I said he could chill there for a bit. So the lady at that table starts asking him questions and he seemed kind of confused.

Even from where I was sitting, I could tell these weren't normal questions. She was using "You" sentences as opposed to "I" sentences. What are those you might be asking?

"You" Example: "What do you do at this table?"
"I" Example: "I'm curious about what this table's for."

The first, while not by much, is more aggressive, while the second gives off a more friendly, passive vibe. So I called the lady over and let her know that I'd be in a better position to answer her questions. And that's probably where the real story starts.

Immediately I could tell this woman was looking to inflict her own personal beliefs on me rather than being open to what the MSA is all about. These types of things are apparent from the type of language a person uses, the tone of voice, body language and a slew of other things.

Basically what happened was, she starts telling me how Muslims are violent. Mkay, first of all, come again? You're going to stand there in front of me at a table where I'm inviting you to know more about people of the Islamic faith and tell me you already know it all? Then don't stop at the table, lady!

She goes on about how she's "read" the Qur'an and how violent it was. Excuuuuse me? You did not READ the Qur'an! You read verses shown to you by those adverse to the Book of Truth from the start! She mentioned how the Qur'an mentioned "all this killing of infidels, and it just scared me to death!"

This is my blog about Islam so I will refrain from an expletive I would otherwise be more than happy to burst out with right now. *coughbitchcough* O.o Did I say something? =O

Of course, I explained to her right off the bat that if she's reading an English Translation of the Qur'an it will likely have commentary which explains the context under which the verses should be read. I further explained to her that a lot of verses were revealed during war time and that of course, there were treaties being made and treaties that were broken, etc, so the rules will always change (just look at the USA- it's wartime and all of a sudden, it's okay to go all Big Brother on everyone.)

Seeing that I had that base covered, she immediately switches tack and starts talking about how she stopped by the brother's table once and someone was sitting there and what he said "shocked her" to the core or whatever the hell it did to her. She mentioned the beheadings and the brother had apparently replied that they deserved it because of Guantanamo.

Now, this lady had the NERVE to continue with: "What about Guantanamo? What- that they have their rights, are being clothed and fed and can pray?"

Two friends of mine, Aysha and Khansaa were nearby, and heard what the lady was saying and, well...let's just say they verbally took her down. ^_-

But let's continue with dissecting the atrocity of this woman's remarks, namely about Guantanamo. Tell me one thing, lady: If they REALLY "had their rights" as you claim, then why the hell were they taken to Guantanamo Bay and not kept on American soil?! Duh, to take away their claim to rights. Simple enough.

They're allowed to eat and pray and are clothed? Hello? THEY ARE HELD WITHOUT CHARGES!! Eating and clothing and letting them pray are the LEAST of which they're entitled to. How dare this woman?!

Earlier in the discussion, she'd slighted my friend Aysha, as well, because Aysha wears niqaab, and the woman dismissed her by saying something stupid like, "I'm sorry, I can't understand you, I need to see lips and stuff."

Chyea, so telephones must be a nightmare for you, right? Get real.

It turned out to be a shouting match that made passersby stop and stare and we had a small crowd gathering. Aysha kept trying to explain to the woman in increasingly louder tones (because she kept trying to drown Aysha out) that the woman needed to be civil and not condescending. Khansaa ended by letting the woman know if she didn't want to learn or ask us politely, then she could leave.

The woman insisted, "I'm not gonna leave, you can't make me leave!" (how old was she?), but then left after saying, "This is the problem with you people- it's either your way or the highway."

How much more "your way or highway" can you be when you put in your two cents and then leave? O.o Some people...

At the time, I was disapproving of my friend's actions because I felt that if we just had a civil discussion, maybe she would see what we were trying to explain. I really felt this. But I've been thinking about this incident a lot lately and I wish I'd taken the initiative first.

Dialog is all good and well but that's not what that woman came seeking. Yes, we are a religion of peace and love but that doesn't mean we should stand by while you try to slander it to my face. I always try to take the idealistic route, but sometimes that just won't cut it.

And as a side note, later on we had some agnostic dude who tried to be all, "Been there done that" and entered into a very cocky debate with this Anglical Christian who'd been talking to us at our table. I really didn't like the condescending manner of the agnostic dude, really. He was quite close to being smacked in the face...

Whatever.

MSA = <3 ^__^ Always something interesting, that's for sure. =P

I'm pretty sure student activities hates us. >.>;

Subhanallah!

NOTE: The dialog between John (APC) and I is being continued via e-mail. However, if there are lots of excellent points discussed, then, with John's permission, I will post the rest of that discussion here at a later date.

But anyhow, on with today's post!

About a month ago, I was reading the Qur'an (I read with English translations so that I can actually understand it), and I came across several passages that were just so beautiful, I HAD to reflect on them.

How many creatures are there that do not carry their provisions with them? Allah provides for them as He provides for you...
[from Qur'an 29:60]

Subhanallah- how true this is! I mean, think about it. People are the only living creatures that worry so excessively about the longterm. While we need to be prepared, we also need to remove ourselves from becoming overly worldly.

There are people all over the world that are MUCH less fortunate than we are. They don't know if they are going to have even water the next day. And yet, in the morning they wake up and Allah provides for them from his bounty and they are thankful.

I feel I should do this more. Even if I spent my whole life thanking Allah (swt) for the blessings he has bestowed upon me, it would not be enough to cover even a minute's worth of goodness.

Why is making a six-figure salary so important to people? It won't go with you after a certain point, so how is it worth it? So much dunya-dari!

Inshallah I hope to improve myself, little by little, into a better muslimah.

The Alternative

A comment from a reader (who signed only as "A Possible Convert"), brought up an excellent point about my previous post. It was something I completely failed to mention, and I do apologize about this. The fact is, when I was writing the post I assumed I'd be writing to a Muslim audience.

Anyhow, here's the comment from "A Possible Convert":

"I actually think your post does not have substance. You are talking about the Western culture, but exactly what are you comparing to? I agree with some of the senselessness of the mentality of it, yes, but the topic is lacking an aim. Where is it going? It seems you have a stronger opinion about something else but you do not mention it. I would be interested in learning more about this if it was a bit more thorough. But then again, I suppose this is a blog after all."

APC, the short answer to your question is: The Islamic Way of Life. For the longer answer, continue reading and discover what this would mean. But first, a couple of quick definitions:

Mahrem - A man whom a woman can never marry because her close relation with him (eg father, brother, uncle, son, etc.). Her husband is also her Mahrem. (from www.eathalal.org)

Fitna - VERY GENERALLY SPEAKING, a situation in which sin is possible or an invitation to sin. "To cause fitna" is to create an environment where sin is possible and/or encouraged. This term can be hard to explain at times, the definition is my own, so please anyone correct me if I am off the mark here.

In a practicing Muslim family, non-mahrem males and females interact largely only when their families interact. If the family were in the West, then school would also be another time. Even as children, girls generally play together and the boys do likewise.

At around the age they hit puberty, they are consciously separated. This is not a sudden withdrawal from society. In fact, it is a gradual, growing awareness that is accepted and encouraged through the familial and social structures.

Now, let's look at the wisdom behind this. What is one thing puberty is always closely associated with? "The urge to merge." So when you encourage separation of the genders, you encourage a greater awareness between them. That means there is a FAR LESS chance of either member forgetting the consequences that can arise from free and unguarded mingling. Does this sound complicated? Here's an example.

If you put a male and female teenager together in a room alone, after all the small talk is used up (if it even starts from there), the next natural thing will be flirting. And while some may think verbal flirting is not so bad, we all know where that road goes. You flirt for a while, laugh a little, flip your hair, he'll check you out. It's how the game works. From here, it pretty much follows my last post.

This isn't to say that every single teenager will react in the same way, but it is true that this is the path of human behavior. These are the inherent tendencies we all, as humans, have. We were created this way.

It used to be that in Islamic society (and throughout the world, actually), men and women were married only a few years after puberty. And there was a wisdom in this. In this way, the two young people would be able to satisfy their desires within the marital bonds.

However, since this no longer happens, the Western world took up dating as a way to release sexual frustrations (however, as I stated in my previous post, this merely leads to promiscuity, hurting hearts and broken marriages).

The Islamic viewpoint, meanwhile, encourages abstinence. In more colloquial terms: keep it in your pants. Some of the benefits of abstinence include, but are not limited to:

1. Going into a secure relationship with a clean slate.

Neither of you are carrying extra baggage of past relationships, hurts or expectations. You are beginning the relationship with rights and responsibilities, which makes the relationship much more secure. Knowing you're in it for the long haul also increases, as a general rule, the tolerance level of both parties, adding to the harmony of the union.

2. You are more able to give this relationship your all.

Since this would be your first relationship, you are ready and willing to give yourself wholly to it. You might go the extra mile to make your spouse happy, knowing he or she is doing the same for you.

3. On the medical end, this totally works, too.

From the medical standpoint, abstinence until marriage is great. By now, everyone knows how STDs have been going around. Teenage pregnancy is on the rise like crazy. A fairly underrepeated fact, in my opinion is the emotional/mental trauma that can result from promiscuity.

So why bother creating all the fitna that is dating (not to mention the DRAMA), when there is a much healthier alternative? And it's really not as hard as people think! It's harder in the West, but not nearly as much as people seem to propagate. Plus, you can't miss what you don't know yet. ^_-

Also, the arranged marriage system keeps young people from trying to set forth and "find Mr/Mrs. Right". This is because of the way arranged marriages work (which, by the way, are NOT the same thing as forced marriages).

In an arranged marriage, the parents of a girl/boy will ask around among friends, family members and colleagues for suitable marriage partners for their daughter/son. Qualities such as faith, ideals, life goals, financial stability, ambitions and other such long-term aspects of the potential match are looked at.

After the parents find someone most of their criterion, they arrange a supervised meeting. It is here the potential marriage partners can gauge each others' attractiveness and assess "chemistry" levels.

If all goes well, the marriage is planned and the two are married! ^__^ Now they can look forward to a life of togetherness in which they can raise a family and do other things that married people do. O.o

How do I know this system works or why am I so sure about it? That's simple: life has shown me that it does. While in high school is when I had the most non-muslim friends. Out of maybe 10 or 11 of them (and they were a pretty diverse group), 7 or 8 had parents that were divorced and 1 had his parents almost file for a divorce.

Out of all of my Muslim friends, however, I really don't know anyone whose parents are divorced. I have a divorced aunt, though. She's all the way over in Pakistan. And out of all of my 16 blood aunts and uncles (blood related through either my mom or my dad's side), she's the only one who is divorced.

Alhamdulillah.

They Do?

Lately, I've been thinking over a small debate I had with someone, I don't remember who. As a matter of fact, I don't even remember what the debate was about. I may just have been discussing something with my brothers and sister. Anyhow, I remember one of the things I was ranting on about.

One thing (among many) I don't get about the Western world is their notion of marriage. I have lived my entire life here and it still fails to make sense to me. Here is what happens:

As soon as they can, boys and girls in the West (or at least in America) acquire "boyfriends" or "girlfriends". They proceed to do whatever pleases them, as long as they feel they're doing it "responsibly". Yea, right. Anyways, they carry on like this for what- 10? 15 years?

If the average American starts "dating" at the age of 12, and prolongs marriage until the age of 30, that's a solid 18 years of dating. This is a fairly conservative estimate, I'm sure most would agree.

Wow, think about that for a second, will you? 18 years. That's a really long time to be hopping from person to person to person until you magically are supposed to find Mr. Right! Or Mrs. Right.

For the sake of coherence, I'm going to continue the rest of the article from a woman's perspective but bear in mind that everything I say here, applies to BOTH genders.

So anyway, for 18 long years, the average American is conditioned to do what? To feel "in love" for a while, to cuddle and engage in all manner of other business with a "partner" for a while, with no guarantee that this individual will be there even a month or week from today.

Eventually, there are fights (especially if the couple is living together), and certain aspects of a partner become unappealing. Based on the many, many years of dating experience, the average American is fully equipped with the tools necessary to deal with this dilemma: dump the sucker.

Yup, that's right. He clearly isn't worth your time, or, here's a good one: there's just no chemistry anymore (because of course, all that heavy chemistry from the beginning's evaporated by now), etc, etc. The list could go on and on.

But you see what's happening here, don't you?

How can Western individuals expect to go through all this and still think that they can walk up to the alter on The Day, say "I do" and really, truly live happily ever after? Where does this myth come from? You do not change your lifestyle or your habits overnight.

Western society teaches their youth that people are expendable. It is okay to dump a guy because "there are other fish in the sea." If you are no longer in love, end it with your husband, just like you did with your boyfriends before. I mean, really, in the Western world, what's the difference between a husband and a boyfriend? Anything? I definitely have yet to tell the terms apart.

Things are so bad here that kids can legally divorce their parents. THEIR PARENTS! How do Westerners expect to hold onto their relationships when the purest relationship of all, that of a mother and her child, can be severed by a law?

I'm not taking a shot at the every single non-Muslim member of the Western world...all I'm saying is- numbers speak louder than words.

Currently, the divorce rate for first time marriages is just about 50%. Believe it or not, second and third marriages are in the 65-70% range. Think about it.

And lets not forget those pesky spouses that cheat...

About Me

Name: Sairah

Age: 19

Current pet-peeve:

Politics. Because they're more twisted than most people know, and because 99% of the United States is happily ignorant of the facts.

Also, (and this is closely related to politics), I am absolutely splenetic over Corporate America. Y'know, all this duniya-dari?

Link This Blog

Here you'll find buttons, banners and text links with which you can link to this blog (if anyone would care to do so). Enjoy!

Buttons

..pending. -_- Bear with me.

Text Link

Dar al-Islam
Dar al-Islam

About This Layout

Name: Taj Masjid

Version: 1.0

Color Scheme: Black, deep reds, oranges and some browns. Basically, like a vibrant sunset. =)

Comments:

This layout was actually created by me for a project during my senior year of high school for AP World History class. We had to do something on Islam and I chose to make a website. It was very small with just what I needed for the assignment, but I decided to keep it up.

So now it's been revamped, spruced up, and recycled for this blog. ^^

Image Credits: Digitalfestival's "A Mystical Journey Called India" Photo Gallery

Copyright Information

This blog, Dar al-Islam is owned and operated by Sairah Bashir.

[NOTE: This blog is about Islam, and I am a Muslimah, however, everyone makes mistakes. If you catch one, or think something might be a little bit off- please tell me!

Also, most of the opinions expressed here are just that- opinions. Everyone is entitled to their own.]

Layout � Sairah Bashir
Not to be reused or redistributed without explicit, written consent.

Content may be freely quoted (credit is appreciated! ^__^).
[NOTE: Where a verse from the Qur'an is cited, the credit, of course is not mine. Same goes for any other quotation].

Credits To CodeGrrl

The basic, barebones coding for this fully-functional blog is credited to the awesome CodeGrrl.com. I went on to take some creative licenses and did a bit here, and a bit there (but not much >.>).

The tutorials for building your own blog at that site are quite awesome, so if anyone is looking to make one, I'd send you there. =)